


Beck and Call

by HDO



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Banter, Dirty Talk, Established Relationship, Humor, M/M, Military Kink, Roleplay, Sexual Content, Thigh Holsters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-25
Updated: 2012-10-25
Packaged: 2017-11-17 01:15:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,734
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/545903
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HDO/pseuds/HDO
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>“So this is a little perfunctory.”</i>
</p>
<p>  <i>“What?” Steve slipped back into the bed, wearing a pair of his old, saggy bedtime boxer briefs.</i></p>
<p>  <i>“This.” Danny waved a finger back and forth between himself and Steve as Steve leaned back against the headboard and tucked the top sheet around his waist. “Our sex life. And believe me, I’ve had a perfunctory sex life before, and I never want it again.”</i></p>
<p>Danny asks Steve to dress up for him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Beck and Call

**Author's Note:**

> You guys, I don't even know. I can say that I made myself blush writing parts of this. Enjoy!
> 
> \---  
> Update on 11/8/12: So I've made the decision to change something in the story. Specifically, I have replaced the joke in which Steve teased Danny about fantasizing being a prostitute. After posting this originally, I reflected upon that joke and wondered if it was potentially harmful. I eventually decided that even though the joke wasn't intentionally malicious towards prostitutes, I was using prostitutes as the punchline of a joke, and that's still in my book anti-prostitutes and sex work in general. I don't want to be about that. So, now you have a joke about Fabio (and hopefully Fabio won't find the joke hurtful.) I even think that the stupid Fabio joke is way more in character for Steve than the prostitute joke. (Because the seriousness of this work merits proper characterization, obvs.)
> 
> I apologize for making the original joke, and to anyone who may have been offended or hurt by it. <3

“So this is a little perfunctory.” 

“What?” Steve slipped back into the bed, wearing a pair of his old, saggy bedtime boxer briefs.

“This.” Danny waved a finger back and forth between himself and Steve as Steve leaned back against the headboard and tucked the top sheet around his waist. “Our sex life. And believe me, I’ve had a perfunctory sex life before, and I never want it again.”

Steve frowned. “We’re busy people, Daniel. What’s wrong with a little efficiency?”

Danny cocked his head at Steve, incredulous. “One’s love life should never be about efficiency. It’s meant to be reveled in, to be fun, to be experimental!”

“Experimental?” Steve looked at Danny inquisitively. “You want to experiment?”

Danny let out an exasperated sigh. “No. Yes. Maybe! I’d maybe like to spice things up a little. Maybe then you’ll be encouraged to actually _stay_ in bed for a little while afterwards, instead of just jumping up to the bathroom.”

Steve grinned at Danny. “Do you want to cuddle more after sex?”

“Fuck you,” Danny spat. He rolled away from Steve, pulling the top sheet with him.

Steve turned out the lamp on his bedside table and quickly snuggled up behind Danny. Danny could _feel_ Steve’s grin as he nuzzled Danny’s neck, which only made him even more irritated.

“Danno, I was just teasing. Really, what do you want to try?” Steve murmured affectionately.

“You first,” Danny replied grumpily.

“Nope. I asked first. Tell me, Daniel…” Steve’s voice dropped to a deep, seductive tone. He nipped Danny’s ear with his teeth. “What’s your _fantasy?_ ”

“You’re an ass.”

“You love my ass.”

“Not the point.” 

Steve chuckled. “Okay. But really, I want to know. What do you want to try? What do you…y’know, fantasize about?” Steve said curiously.

Danny’s mind supplied a distinct image that had been popping up in his mind lately. He blushed despite himself. “Do you really have to use that word? _Fantasize?_ This isn’t a romance novel, Fabio.”

“I don’t know, maybe I’d look pretty good with long, blond hair. Really, Danno, was that so hard to ask for?” Steve teased. 

“Steve,” Danny said curtly.

“I think we drove by a wig shop just earlier today. We can play out your fantasy by tomorrow night,” Steve said in mock seriousness.

“Steven!” Danny snapped. “Seriously, why do I put up with you?” He sighed. “Okay. You wanna know? Then you’re gonna know. Promise me you won’t laugh.”

“I won’t laugh.” Steve said earnestly, patting Danny’s stomach.

“Okay.” Danny paused. “So sometimes, I think about you…” Danny swallowed, gathering his courage. “Wearing nothing but your fancy Navy hat, your goofy boots, and your thigh holsters. There, I said it, it’s done, it’s out there.” Danny fidgeted in Steve’s hold around his body.

Steve was silent for several moments. “Oh. So…” Danny could hear the apprehension in his voice. “I didn’t realize you’d want me to dress up.”

“Uh…surprise?” Danny said uneasily.

“And Danny, it’s a cover, not a fancy Navy hat. And you’d never wear a cover with those other things, that makes no sense,” Steve continued, sounding insulted.

“It’s not _supposed_ to make sense, that’s why it’s a fantasy!” Danny exclaimed.

“I…” Steve paused. “I don’t know if I can do that.”

“Seriously, Steven? Out of all the possible weird shit I could have thrown at you, you can’t deal with that?” Danny said, irritated. 

“It’s work clothing. And those covers are a sign of dignity, not objects for sexual exploitation," Steve said with disdain.

“Steve.” Danny paused for effect. “Two words: my ties.”

“Those are different,” Steve replied matter-of-factly. “They’re not functional work attire. Nor do they command respect.”

“If you want to get laid again anytime soon, I’d suggest you shut up about now,” Danny warned. He pushed back against Steve, signaling he wanted him off. 

“Fine,” Steve muttered sullenly, and rolled onto his back. They fell into fitful sleep, not touching.

 

When Danny was herding Grace out the door to take her back to Rachel, he knew he was in for trouble by the look on Steve’s face. Steve was smirking smugly and giving him what Danny could only call _bedroom eyes._

“See you when you get back, Danno,” Steve drawled out, raising one eyebrow up and down slowly. 

Most people would probably be excited by such sexy cues from their partner, but Danny just felt apprehensive. Steve was being weird. He was up to something. 

 

When Danny came back into the house after dropping off Grace, he found a note on the coffee table. 

_Report to the bedroom immediately for duty.  
\- Lt. Commander McGarrett_

Danny’s heart flipped. Okay, this was promising, at least more so than alarming.

He walked up the stairs, apprehension and curiosity twisting up his gut. When he made it to the landing, he saw that the bedroom door was closed. There was another note on the door that said _safe word is pineapple._

“Huh,” he said out loud. He checked himself over to make sure he was presentable. With a deep breath, he opened the door slowly.

Danny’s jaw dropped. There, in the middle of the dimly lit bedroom, stood Steve with his arms crossed over his chest, wearing nothing but a pair of his work boots, thigh holsters, and his formal Navy cover. His dick was erect.

“Come inside, Detective Sergeant Williams. We have an urgent mission to complete,” Steve said in a smooth tone. Then he gave Danny the most deliberate up and down eye hump he had ever received. 

Danny jerked out of his shock and closed the door behind him. He walked up slowly to Steve.

“Are you on drugs? Did someone drug you?” It wasn’t what Danny wanted to say, but they were the first words that came out of his mouth.

Steve smirked at him, then stepped forward and began slowly unbuttoning Danny’s shirt. “If you value your career and reputation, then I would not make such accusations about your reporting officer, especially not to his face.” Steve winked at him and pulled Danny’s shirttails out from his slacks. Danny just stared at him, mute, as he shrugged the shirt off and let it drop to the floor. 

“That’s better. Now,” Steve switched to a more commanding tone as he backed away. “Take off your shoes.” 

Danny knelt down and unlaced his loafers with shaking fingers. He stood back up and toed them off his feet. Steve stared at him down his long nose the entire time, the want in his eyes belying his serious expression.

“Good,” Steve remarked. “I must observe that I am remiss to reprimand you for misconduct when I am wearing my cover indoors, against regulations.” He removed his cover and placed it on the chair by the window. He calmly walked back to the end of the bed, dick bobbing along with his steps. “My apologies.” He smirked and gave his dick a cheeky tug. Then he turned to face the bed and lay down on his belly, bent over the end of it. “Now, for the mission at hand,” he said conversationally as he arranged himself, toes of his boots dragging the floor, ass wiggling in the air as he made himself comfortable. Propped up on his forearms, he turned his head to look over a shoulder slowly, and said levelly to Danny, “I command you to fuck me.”

Danny raised a fist to his mouth and bit down on a knuckle as he moaned.

Steve raised an eyebrow at him. “Well? That’s an order.”

Danny rushed to the end of the end and leaned over Steve, bracketing his hands around Steve’s torso. He leaned down to whisper in Steve’s ear, “I’m…I’m at your beck and call.” He had meant it to sound as sultry as Steve’s script, volley back what he had started, but instead it came out slightly broken.

Nearly overwhelmed, he kissed Steve’s skin fervently, starting at the base of his neck and down to the small of his back, tasting the sweat already breaking out over Steve’s skin. Then he knelt down on his knees and slid his hands down Steve’s sides until he reached the waist strap of the thigh holsters, tugging on it. As he licked a stripe over the skin bordering one of the straps encircling Steve’s thigh, Steve groaned. 

Danny kissed his way back up to his buttocks and spread Steve’s cheeks. Steve moaned and pushed back into Danny as he wantonly licked into him.

“Huh. Something sweet.” Danny slurred. “What did you do?”

Steve reached into one of the thigh holsters and dropped a tube of lube on the bed. “Butter cream frosting.”

Danny whimpered. “You’re an animal. An absolute animal.”

“I take missions very seriously, Detective Sergeant Williams. I am always prepared for duty. Stand up,” he commanded. 

Danny obeyed. Steve reached back to lazily palm Danny’s crotch, his dick hot and hard under his slacks. “Now, are you prepared for duty?”

Danny sucked air through his teeth as Steve traced the outline of his cock. He batted away Steve’s hand as he leaned back to undo his slacks and yank down his boxers. Cock springing free, he grabbed the tube of lube, hastily squirted some out, rubbed it on himself, and threw the tube across the room. Then he slid into Steve, already slick and open.

Danny started pumping in and out of Steve immediately as he draped over Steve’s back, both of them moaning wordlessly. Danny nipped at Steve’s ear and the side of his neck urgently before resting his lips on the back of Steve’s neck, breathing hot against Steve’s skin, nearly overcome with pleasure.

His trance was broken as Steve reached up and back to grip into Danny’s hair and held Danny’s face down hard to the back of his neck. “Is that all you got? I said _fuck_ me, Williams,” he growled.

“Yeah?” Danny rolled Steve’s hand off his head and leaned back, pausing his thrusting. He gripped into the waistband of the thigh holsters at Steve’s hips again, slowly and deliberately. Then as he straightened up fully, he pulled Steve’s hips up and off the bed with him, forcing Steve’s ass up into the air. Steve drew his knees up onto the bed and braced himself on all fours in anticipation.

Danny paused there for a moment, both of them breathing hard, until Steve started nearly squirming. Then, without warning, Danny resumed his thrusting, pounding as hard as he could into Steve, using the hold on the waistband as leverage. Steve eagerly pushed back against him, letting out a short, loud moan with each thrust.

“How’s that? Am I going above and beyond the call of duty?” Danny asked Steve breathlessly.

Steve answered by burying his face into the bed and moaning louder. 

“Am I?” Danny pushed.

“ _Yes_ ,” Steve answered brokenly. 

“Good,” Danny answered, sounding as gone as Steve.

Steve turned his head to the side. “Fuck.” He maneuvered onto one forearm again as he reached back to his dick with the other. “Fuck.”

“Oh, giving yourself a hand, I see?” Danny teased breathlessly.

“I’m trying not to come,” Steve panted. “Tell me when you’re going to.”

Danny let out a desperate moan. “Fuck, babe, you’re killing me.”

And like that, Danny felt it building in him, and he knew he wouldn’t last much longer. “Shit, shit, babe, I’m gonna come, I’m gonna come,” Danny cried out, thrusting faster into Steve.

Steve took the hand he was gripping himself with and started pumping it fast. Within seconds, Steve was crying out. Steve clenched around Danny’s dick, pushing Danny over the edge. 

The pleasure ripped through Danny so intensely that he felt as if he were going to pass out. But he stayed just on the edge of awareness, reveling in Steve’s soft, sated sounds. Danny came back down slowly, thrusting slower and slower until the spasms stopped. 

Panting and still inside Steve, Danny looked over to the clock on the bed stand. “Fifteen minutes. Fifteen fucking minutes since I walked into this house.”

Steve let out a breathless laugh beneath him, head pillowed on an arm. “Affirmative, they were.”

Danny slipped out of Steve and tucked himself back into his boxers. He eased himself off of Steve and rolled onto his back on the bed, boneless. Steve stood and walked gingerly to the bathroom. 

“And yet he still runs off to the bathroom right after,” Danny said, an arm thrown over his eyes. 

Steve ignored him. He reappeared a few minutes later with a damp washcloth in hand. The thigh holsters and boots were gone. 

“You came in my ass. You know how I feel about that,” Steve lectured.

Danny removed his arm from his face and turned his head to shoot Steve an accusatory glare. “Do you know how I feel about you blowing your load all over the bed?”

Steve bent down to wipe the wet spot on the bed with the washcloth, staring at Danny petulantly. Danny stared back, eyebrows raised. Steve’s straight face cracked within just a few seconds.

“Blowing my load?” Steve asked incredulously, laughing. Danny chuckled with him.

Danny waved a hand at the washcloth. “Stop that, give that to me, you’re doing nothing, it’s a lost cause. Now we just have to dry clean this whole damn duvet, you horny Neanderthal.”

Steve grinned and tossed the washcloth over onto Danny’s chest. Then he managed to remove the duvet from under Danny and off the bed before flopping on the bed next to him.

Danny tossed the washcloth indiscriminately onto the floor after using it. Then he turned onto his side and very deliberately looked at Steve.

“Role play. I never asked for role play, especially not with confused police and military rankings. Just the goofy outfit.” Danny narrowed his eyes at Steve suspiciously.

Steve shrugged with a frown. “You were the one that said it didn’t have to make sense. And someone suggested I try it.”

Danny balked. “Who did you talk to!”

“Relax, I just asked Catherine for some advice,” Steve placated, eyes closed and arms crossed under his head. 

Danny gestured frantically. “Why? Why would you do that to me?”

Steve opened his eyes and looked at Danny. “What’s the big deal? She and I had been having sex for years before you came along,” 

Danny pointed a finger. “Doesn’t give you permission to tell her my fantasies!”

“Calm down, would you. You don’t even know what she and I -”

“I probably don’t need to know, don’t finish that thought.”

Steve closed his mouth and let out a put-upon sigh before starting again. “I was going to tell you what we talked about. I asked her if that was…” Steve paused and made a vague hand gesture. “A reasonable request. She asked if it was something weird or demeaning, and I had to admit that, no, it wasn’t.” Steve’s mouth twisted up. “So she told me to get over myself, and maybe try a little role playing to go with the outfit. Oh, and she suggested I use a safe word in case you freaked out,” Steve added offhandedly.

Danny covered his face with his hands. “What kind of fucked up plane of existence am I on? You asked your ex-girlfriend for sex advice. With me. Your boyfriend. And we all work together. I have to face her tomorrow with her knowing that you… _role played_ for me,” he hissed.

Steve gave Danny a fond smile and gathered him up into his arms. “Maybe I can make it up to you by inviting her to come to bed with us sometime,” he murmured sexily, nuzzling behind Danny's ear.

Danny perked up. “Oh. Okay. Wait, what?”

“Just a suggestion.” Steve shrugged casually.

Danny had a look of concentration on his face. “Well, she and I do have that awkward commonality of both having had sex with you, so making an invitation like that wouldn’t be completely wild.” Danny frowned. “Really? She’s into that? You’re into that?”

Steve smiled mischievously. “I know _she_ is. I’ll leave it at that. And clearly, I can rise to the occasion when provoked. So yeah, I think it’s all systems go. Unless that would be…” Steve gave Danny an exaggerated doubtful look, “too _experimental_ for you.”

Danny laughed and gave Steve a playful shove, then pulled him in for a kiss.

**Author's Note:**

> This begins and ends with bedguments. Seems fitting. Also, I just couldn't resist a hint of Steve/Danny/Cath OT3, I just love it so much!
> 
> Also, [this is relevant.](http://fuckyeahfive0.tumblr.com/post/35025662550)


End file.
